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All grandmothers are made of gold, but mine SPARKLES
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When the going gets tough the tough go shopping
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Karma is only a bitch if you are
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I’m not bossy I just have better ideas
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You make me laugh so hard tears run down my leg
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Staying home is the new going out
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She thought she could and so she did
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You call them curse words I call them sentences enhancers
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My heart says chocolate but my jeans say damn girl eat a salad
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If it weren’t for wine I’d have no personality whatsoever
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Every dog should have a home and every home should have a dog
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To relieve stress I do yoga just kidding I drink wine in my yoga pants
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My alone time is for everyone’s safety
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If it weren’t for coffee I’d have no personality whatsoever
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Happy girls are the prettiest
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All you need is love and a dog
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Fat is the new Thin
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Go Play Outside
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Luck Favors the Prepared
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By Now the Wine Should Know
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My Give a Damn’s Busted
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Don’t Stop Me Now
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Wash Your Hands Ya Filthy Animal
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Those Without Sin Might Want to Loosen up a Little
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